Internship Week of October 30th

I started a new job as a substitute teacher this week, and spent most of my time in Elementary Schools. I was with Kindergartners more than any other grade it seemed like, and I noticed something. While shy at first, they are happy to tell you all sorts of things about themselves with you, given the opportunity. It’s been a long time since I was around so much constant joy and excitement. It was refreshing as much as it was exhausting.

            I also saw the love of Christ in each of those small human beings. They are so simple; when happy they laugh, when sad they cry, and when they can they give lots of hugs and tell you “I love you.” How wonderfully amazing would the world be if everyone loved the way 5 year-olds do? They look at everyone they see and smile, without needing a reason or expecting anything in return. I had a kindergartner I didn’t know see me standing in the gym, walk up to me, and give me a hug; just because I smiled at her when she walked in. If that isn’t God’s love in the world around me, I don’t know what is.

            These kindergartners also expressed affection for one another. If one wasn’t feeling well, another spoke up and offered to take them to the nurse. If someone was sad, they tried to comfort him or her. They liked to hold hands walking in the hallways, and fought to be able to hold my hands too. There is so much love God has put into us, but I think we forget that it’s ok to share it with one another. We forget that we are all members of One Body in Christ Jesus, and that to love one another is to love Christ.

My Discernment Rock

At the start of Lent the Rector of our church put out a basket of stones in the Narthex and encouraged us to take one and carry it around with us during Lent-the idea being that on Good Friday you come and lay your stone at the foot of the cross. I didn't think too much of it at the time, and so I didn't get a stone or think about the stones until last Sunday. See where I'm going with this don't you?

I arrived early for my first discernment committee meeting and since no one else was there I was sort of meandering about in the Narthex waiting for others to arrive. I came across the basket of stones and looking through them pulled out one that fit into the palm of my hand but not quite comfortably since its sort of triangular in shape. I hadn't planned on keeping it, put I never got around to putting it back.

All through the meeting I clung to that stone. I didn't really think terribly much about it per se it just was there and I like to think it was absorbing all of my worries and fears and thoughts and prayers. I got into the car to head home and realized that I still had the stone in my hand. And so it became my Lenten rock.

This morning I was going to bring it with me to church, but I decided to bring my new Prayer Beads instead so I could get them blessed. And in that moment of deciding not to bring my rock with me, it became my discernment rock. I have decided that I will bring it with me to every meeting, gathering, service, grouping, etc I attend concerning my discernment. And then either on Good Friday or Holy Saturday before the service, I will take my discernment rock filled with all of my discernment worries, fears, hopes, prayers, concerns, and feelings and I will lay it down before the cross. I will in a way lay my discernment at Christ's feet. I pray He will bring it to God on my behalf.